My Hardest Choice
by Kei Tree
Summary: Hermione makes the hardest choice of her life...


AN: Hay ya'll... finally got an idea for a serious Harry Potter   
fic... Yeah, I'm surprised too...LOL Umm, here it is. Please, please   
review and let me know whatcha thought. Also, I'm not a big   
Ron/Hermione, Harry/Hermione, Anybody/Anybody supporter. I just write   
em as they claw their way into my head. Neway, enjoy! =)  
  
Standard disclaimers apply... forever.  
  
  
  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~My Hardest Choice~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
  
  
I had to make the most difficult decision of my life when I   
was eighteen. We were in our last year of Hogwarts, just about to   
graduate. One day me and Ron and Harry were all walking together,   
talking, laughing, just being stupid for as long as we could be. I'm   
surprised, looking back on all that we got through, that we survived,   
intact, still friends, until that day.   
  
I don't remember what Ron said that set Harry off... Something   
stupid about me I'm sure but suddenly they were going at it, fists   
swinging, books flying. I'd never been so horrified, angry,   
embarrassed, and scared in my entire life. I remember that there was   
a group of terrified first years, huddled by the doorway we had just   
come from. I remember Professor McGonagall's face when she pulled   
them apart, the disbelief, the disappointment.   
  
Harry's glasses were broken and he had a black eye, already   
swelling. Ron had a split lip and a bloody nose. Both of them were   
muddy, their robes torn. I remember standing there, meeting Harry's   
eyes, and Ron's, and realizing what they wanted, why there had been so   
much tension lately, why they had resorted to violence. I'm only   
thankful that they didn't think to use their wands.   
  
My two best friends were in love with me and none of us would   
last much longer if things didn't change. I remember looking up,   
meeting Professor McGonagall's too observant eyes, seeing her shake   
her head slightly, perhaps in pity. She took ten points from   
Griffindor, I thought for sure that she would take fifty, and   
dismissed us all.   
  
I walked between them on the way back to the dorms and there   
was such silence... It was as if all three of us were locked away in   
our own little world, our own little hell. The Fat Lady let us all   
into the common room without a single comment. The common room itself   
was empty. I think most of the kids were in the library studying for   
finals. Harry went to his room without a word for either of us. I'd   
never seen him that angry. I got Ron to sit down in an armchair and   
conjured an ice pack. I could have healed him myself but some peverse   
part of me wanted him, wanted them both, to be in a little bit of   
pain.   
  
I knelt on my knees and put the ice on Ron's lip. He flinched   
and refused to meet my eyes. "What the hell were you thinking?" I   
remember demanding, furious.   
  
"Hermione..." he mumbled around the ice pack. I lowered the   
ice and glared.  
  
"Don't you Hermione me Ron Weasley. Were you even thinking at   
all? What possessed you?"   
  
"Hermione," he said softly, "don't be mad." I sighed and put   
the ice back on.  
  
"Oh Ron, why shouldn't I be mad? Do you have any idea how I   
felt when I stood there and watched you try to beat up your, my, best   
friend?" He didn't reply but his face, I'd never seen such pain and   
longing there.   
  
I remember we sat in silence, neither one of us looking at   
each other. After another fifteen minutes I rose. Ron's lip was   
turning purple and he rose with me. He had grown to be a full head   
taller than me, and Harry was just as tall. He was more assured now,   
more like Bill that I would have ever guessed. He wasn't quite as   
suave or sophisticated, not yet, and his hair, while a shaggy mop of   
curly dark red, wasn't long enough to tie back in a pony tail.   
  
"Hermione..."   
  
I stepped back and looked up.  
  
"Don't do this Ron..."   
  
He stepped forward. We both jumped when the door to the   
common room opened and a gaggle of giggling third years spilled in.   
They took one look at me, and Ron's intimidating glare, before   
slinking off to their rooms. He turned back to me.  
  
"Hermione, I can't live like this anymore... Neither can   
Harry." His face fell and his shoulders slumped.   
  
"I don't know what you're talking about," I replied, voice   
catching. And I remember most how he just looked at me, looked at me,   
at my soul. I'd never seen eyes like his before, and I had seen them   
for seven years.   
  
I made the hardest choice of my life at eighteen; I chose Ron   
Weasley, my best friend, over Harry Potter, my best friend.   
  
  
  
  
Harry was angry at us for a very long time. We graduated,   
went our separate paths, Harry down his, me and Ron down ours. I   
wrote Harry all the time, long letters, wedding announcement, news,   
party invitations. He never replied... For seven years all we heard   
was from the newspapers, and word of mouth. He did great things in   
that time, wonderful things, but then we always knew that Harry Potter   
was destined for amazing things.   
  
Then the twins were born. We named them Lily and James,   
somehow it just seemed fitting. Not just because they were Harry's   
parents, but because I hoped that, should evil ever threaten my   
children, that me and Ron would have the strength to do what they did,   
sacrifice ourselves. We made Harry their godparent, even if we didn't  
know if he'd ever lay eyes on them.   
  
But then one day, the door bell rang. Yes, the door bell...   
Some Muggle contraptions had leaked into our home over the years. I   
chased Lily into the nursery where Ron was trying to wrestle James   
down to take a nap before going to answer the door. I pulled it open   
and there he was, as if it was yesterday, and not ten years later.  
  
He was so much the same, but different. Harry still had the   
tousled hair, the brilliant green eyes, the glasses, the vivid scar.   
He had filled out though. He was still lanky but there was muscle on   
him that was new, and his face... There was pain and sorrow and   
wisdom that hadn't been there ten years ago. I heard Ron come up to   
stand behind me. Harry looked at us both and opened his arms.   
  
It was at that moment, as the three of us hugged, that I knew,   
with all of my heart, that I had chosen right. Harry came in and met   
his godchildren. He and Ron, it was as if no time had passed. They   
were best friends again, older, slower, but best friends. It wasn't   
quite that easy for us. Too much had passed between us. Things were   
okay, different, but okay.  
  
I know one day that Harry will find a nice girl who will make   
him happy in a way that I never would have been able to. Harry was   
danger and adventure, even if he didn't mean to be. I loved him, love   
him still, as my closest friend. But it was Ron who gazed into my   
eyes and found my heart. Ron Weasley, not Harry Potter. Besides, I   
really hate it when Harry calls me Herm, a habit he picked up around   
year six I believe, one of the few lasting marks of Draco's   
tauntings.   
  
Wish Harry luck and happiness, I've already found mine. Maybe, maybe   
one day I'll be a godmother for Harry's kids. Oh, and good luck to   
you all as well, especially those of you facing the hardest choices in   
your respective lives. Follow your heart and don't be afraid to truly   
look someone in the eyes. That's the best advice I can give you   
all.   
  
  
  
Love Hermione 


End file.
